nightfox: (Leviticus-Gay Rights)
This is really just a rant but I keep seeing this and it really honks me off. There are two places in particular that this issue keeps popping up.

First, I am a happy member of [livejournal.com profile] merlin_finders. I love getting recs from other people's searches and I like being able to help out if I can find something for someone else. All in all, it's a great comm. However, I really, really hate when someone takes the time to emphatically specify, NO SLASH. Really? You have to just spew it out like that? Not, "I prefer gen fic" or "I'm looking for het pairings"?

I mean, I understand that slash isn't for everyone and you are certainly within your rights to read what you want to read but there really is something about the way that phrase reads that just screams homophobia to me.

I find it amazing the amount of intolerance you can cram into two small words. The disgust and disdain that pours off that simple statement is astonishing.

On FF.net, authors show their hate with the same phrase or the slight variant of Not Slash and they often take the time to put in bold, italics or ALL CAPS just to be sure you got the message. Slash is nasty and you won't find it in my pristine little fic!

This has been building in me for a while now. I used to just shrug and keep on going but the more I see it, the more it bothers me. I have to be honest, I don't care how good your story might be, if you label yourself as a homophobe at the very top of the damned thing, I sure as hell am not going to read any further. It's not that I'm exclusively looking to read slash either. I'll take well written het and gen fic any day. But I'll be double dipped in dog shit before I support the work of an intolerant prick!

Same thing goes for searches on [livejournal.com profile] merlin_finders. If you say NO SLASH, you get NO FIC from me. I may have exactly what you are looking for in my hot little hands but you have just shown yourself unworthy of my help. Take your shriveled little hating heart and be on your way.

OK, that's it for now. Time for me to go fall on my nose and sleep for a few hours!
nightfox: (Colin Reads)
Alright, I've had time to watch and rewatch S5E2 a few times. It took me a while to process my thoughts about this episode because most of it just honked me off.


nightfox: (Colin WtF)
Something someone wrote in a video summary brought a thought to my head that made me sick to my stomach. (Well, I already was sick to my stomach, have been all day, this just made it worse.)

When interviewed, the J's have kind of blown off the magical reveal. That irritated quite a few of us fans. They've also now revealed that they are going to do a pretty big jump in time between Series/Season 4 and 5 (if Mordred's apparent age is any indication it's going to be a hell of a leap forward).

What if those muthafucka's do the magical reveal off-screen sometime in the years between Season 4 & 5? What if we NEVER get to see it at all?

*screeches and tears out a few handfuls of hair just thinking about it*

They CAN'T do that to us...can they?

Not a nice thought at 3:30am.
nightfox: (Default)
Hello my lovely and caring friends! I can't tell you how much your concern and well wishes have been appreciated. Just a minor update on my healing progress. I saw my surgeon today and he's cautiously pleased about my progress. My x-rays look good and my neck issues seem to be slowly (very effing slowly) improving but now that my neck feels better, my thoracic (middle) spine pain seems to be getting worse and he is not officially allowed to investigate that due to insurance restrictions. Arrrrgg!! So now I have to track down my elusive and silent case manager or (if I can't get her) my case adjuster to try and get that looked into. I hate insurance companies with all my soul.

Still fighting the battle against sleep and drowsy, half-dead wakefulness. When will I have my brain back for more than a few minutes a day? Well, some days I get it back for a few hours and that's when I dive in and write but hell, only 2-3 hours a day of lucidity (if I am lucky) is wearing on my nerves.

In cool news, I want to help pimp the following:


Merlin T-Shirt Design Fest

Prompt List Preview goes up tomorrow April 13 and Prompt Claiming Begins Sunday April 15!
http://merlin-tshirts.livejournal.com
nightfox: (Merlin Sleeping)
I just got back from my first post-surgical visit to my MD and he's very happy with my progress. My incisions are both healing really well and while I'm frustrated with my pain level and continued need for what I consider way too many drugs, he assured me that it's normal and I need to stay on them for a while longer. My x-rays are apparently "excellent", so at least the grafted bone and larger hardware seem to be working out so far.

So I shall continue to be a dopey dish for a bit longer. I keep falling asleep sitting up! Several times I've woken up with my face on my keyboard and the imprints of the keys dug into my cheek and forehead. This morning, my bestie found me just sitting up, cross-legged on the floor, spine straight and my chin tucked down on my neck brace which in turn was braced against my chest, dead out asleep, hands still on my laptop keyboard! And like dead out asleep; it actually took her calling my name several times to wake me up. I never sleep that deep. Usually I am such a light sleeper that if a squirrel farts in a tree two blocks away it'll wake me up!

I hate narcotics!! Even when I need them, I hate them. I had one day of clarity in the past 14 days and it came at the cost of massive pain. Science has just got to come up with a better system of pain control than this. It's absurd!

OK, I am off to nap some more cuz I'm feeling the percocet I just took. On yeah, Doc increased my Valium due to my increased muscle spasms, so now I can sleep even more! Yay. :-|

Good news is no more bandage changing and I get to dump the neck brace in another 2 weeks! I went out for dinner with friends last night to my favorite Moroccan restaurant and I swear, people stare at you like you're something nasty just because you're wearing a visible medical device. How dare I disrupt their mental aesthetics by appearing in public with such an ugly thing on. Shallow twits. On a terrific note though, dinner was Fabulous and I only nodded off twice during the meal :D I need to learn to cook more Moroccan dishes, I LOVE that food!! I could happily eat that 5 times a week.

More good news, I get to start physical therapy in 6 weeks :D Can't wait!

Thanks everyone for all the positive thoughts and well wishing, I really do appreciate it ♥
nightfox: (DarkGirl)
I will never, ever, ever again publish an actual WIP. What the hell did I get myself into? It's not my commitment to story that's an issue, it's the commitment of others that is wiggin me out. I never anticipated having the weight of other people's expectation hang over something I wrote. But here I am, seven chapters into a work and I know it's just going to piss people off when they finally get to the end.

I didn't mean for it to happen! I actually started this stupid thing off with totally different expectations of where the plot was going. It's morphed into something unrecognizable from it's starting point and as such, I can't in good conscience give it the happy ending I was going to originally pen. I unwittingly wrote my characters into a scenario of domestic abuse and I just can not, can not even in a fantasy setting, give lip-service to the idea that abusers change.They do NOT. Well, not without intense personal motivation, self-control and a lot of therapy. Therapy that just wasn't available in the 6th century. Sorry, can't do it. I like fantasy, hell I adore fantasy but I am not perpetuating the fantasy that after beating up a loved one, saying I'm sorry with lots of tears makes it all better. It's only better til the next time.

So, I have readers already begging me for a happy ending that I'm not going to give them and I now realize that this will probably piss off at least 80% of the people kind enough to give my scribbles their attention (& that's likely a conservative estimate). I have come to the conclusion that it's my fault for ever publishing something without having thought it through. It will not be happening again. From now on, anything I post will be finished at least in rough draft form. I'm not going through agonies of indecision and angst over my own damn plot lines again!

As my dear departed father used to say, "Live and learn, kid! Live and learn!"

I mean, this too shall pass, right?
nightfox: (Default)
*Jumps up and down like a little girl* OMG! The angels at FedEx have delivered my new laptop and it's just so...shiny!! I can't wait to make love play with it! In the grand world of technology today, it's nothing special but when you are broke with a broken computer, it's like something from Heaven! Now I can watch Merlin with sound!! I can hear all those interviews I've been trying to lip-read! And honestly, could you concentrate on words when staring at Colin Morgan's lips? Yeah, it didn't work so well for me either.

Yee!! I am just so excited!!

Porn Fail

Sep. 16th, 2011 01:19 pm
nightfox: (Default)
Porn Fail!--Write what you know or Do The Research!!


It must be said, I love porn. I really love it when porn makes it's way into fan fiction. Even though most fan fiction writers are a bit tentative and most of the porn is pretty soft, it can still be very hot. I have to admit, I probably come to it from a different place than most who write fan fiction since I used to write hard-core, kinky-filthy, acts-that-are-still-illegal-in-most-of-the-US type of porn long before I got into writing fan fics. In consideration for the sensibilities of others, I do tone down my porn-lit tendencies in my fan fiction (yes readers, that is the very tame version). Not only have I written some hard-to-swallow stuff, I've lived quite a bit of it. I spent over a year and a half married to a man who used terror as a means to control me. After I escaped and recuperated a while, I spent the next five years in a frenzy of sexual freedom. I indulged just about all of my fantasies and several I hadn't even dreamed up on my own, It is possible to become drunk on freedom. However, I digress. Having had a life-long and abiding love for sex and all things sexual, I have become something of an information sponge when it comes to the subject. What I haven't actually lived out, I've researched pretty thoroughly. All of the major kinks and fetishes have been absorbed and several of the more obscure as well. Standing at the buffet table at many an orgy, I have been told by the sex-obsessed that I "know too damn much about sex." (Sadly, I have a love of sharing what I know and kind of wind up like a professor at a seminar in porn college).

Now, why this exercise in TMI you ask? It's simple. I don't expect everyone who writes fan fiction to have my rather broad acquaintance with acts of a carnal nature. Hell, I have extensive knowledge but even I do not possess an encyclopedic wisdom on the subject. Trust me, there are more kinks out there than any one woman can ever really know. However, if you are going to write about sex, do your research! I will be the first person to applaud imagination but if you are going to, let's say, write about BDSM, do look beyond the fact that participants tend to wear some leather and use implements called "whips" and "floggers". Information is ridiculously easy to come by on the internet and I assume if you are posting on it, you have access to it! I pick BDSM or D/s because it's something a lot of people who don't know latex from leather, cowhide from deerskin or a ball gag from a cock ring like to try and write about! There are so many sites offering information on that particular subject that you can't swing a paddle on the internet without hitting one. You can see photographic evidence of what sort of damage results from a whip, a flogger, a paddle, a crop...I could go on but I think you get my point by now. You'll also quickly find out that to be called "BDSM" or "D/s" the acts must adhere to the concept of "Safe, sane and consensual" If the man/woman wielding the whip didn't ask the man/woman being whipped for permission, than it's torture not BDSM. If someone who's restrained is fucked without permission, it's not domination, it's rape.

Then there is anal sex. I love to read anal sex scenes by someone who's clearly never actually engaged in the act. Spit is not an adequate lube!! Not unless you frequently engage (and have very recently indulged) in anal sex, then sometimes it is. If you want your inexperienced character spit-lubed, prepared to make them hurt! They may enjoy it but it still hurts! No lube at all...crazy pain! Also, a one finger stretch for 30 seconds...not gonna cut it. Again, there is a lot of information available on the subject. Read some of it!

I won't even get started on the many other kinks out there, I'd be typing all day...probably all week. However, I think I've made my point. If you don't know what you are writing about then FIND OUT!

Thank you, that is all.

nightfox: (Default)
So I live in Southern NJ along the Delaware River, just outside Philadelphia. We started this week with an earthquake (the first one to hit the state in over a decade) and we're ending the week with a Hurricane...the first in nearly a century...hell of a week!

Out I went today to stock up on supplies. Not that bad, I got food staples, water, candles & TP but the one thing you can't find (anywhere in NJ or Eastern Pennsylvania apparently) are D batteries!! Seriously, between my sister and I we hit up every retail store you can imagine and some we had to work at imagining. Chain stores, grocery stores, Ma & Pop stores, gas stations, pharmacies & toy stores. You name it, we tried it. No one has any.

So, if (and it's more like when) we lose power, I will be trapped in a 2 bedroom apartment with my sister and my best friend...who hate each other...in the dark. Oh yes, and 2 black cats who love to not be where you expect them...in the dark. It's already been so gloomy the past 2 days that I need to keep the lights on at high noon...cuz it looks like 9 pm out there. So 3-4 gloomy ass days, 2-3 black nights with shadow-ninja-trip-you cats and two women who despise each other.
Good times! *wince*

I think I'll visit the liquor store before the storm arrives...I wonder how early they open?
nightfox: (Default)
Alright, seriously, anyone who covets long eyelashes clearly never had to wear glasses! I can't wear mascara and I constantly have to clean my lenses because my eyelashes leave smudges right in the middle of my line of sight. It is so frustrating! Arrgg!! Perhaps if they curled up a bit it wouldn't be so bad but unlike the rest of my hair, my eyelashes are stubbornly straight. Straight and transparent at the tips so like little feathery ninjas they sneak in and leave streaky little smudges everywhere! I swear, I am so tempted to take scissors to them and shear them clean off!!

OK, rant over. That is all.

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